Geck-O-Meter: 8 Geckos
They started with shirtless Steve, tender-hearted Steve, and then Danny holding a baby. The Geck-O-Meter just kept going up and up and up! Add Danny’s gray pants and snarky comments. Then they ended with some touching scenes and everyone all dressed up, and I’m a happy girl!
We start with a huge diamond ring attached to a scantily clad woman. The woman and her husband, Dr. and Mrs. Van Horn, are not long for this world, though, as someone breaks into their huge house and shoots them. Oh, dear, now we hear a baby crying!
Cut to Steve asleep. What?! No one told me there would a scene like this. What a great surprise! He is just waking up. He looks like he was expecting someone to be there.
He goes outside and finds Catherine, and asks if she’s nervous about today, her last day in the Navy. She asks for reassurance that Steve is not concerned that she will be working for her ex-boyfriend, and he lies and says no. Then he admits he was lying, and tells her he trusts her. That’s a pretty big deal for Steve to trust someone, I think.
Let’s pause from the sweetness of this scene to admire the delectable deliciousness of Steve’s muscular arms.
Okay, back to the emotions. Wait, no, Steve’s phone is ringing and he must answer it.
Scene of the crime, but you already know what happened (the Van Horns got shot) <–I am heartless. Our guys are looking fine, from all angles. (Apparently I am feeling extra lonely today, since I seem fixated on all of this beauteous sexiness.)
The baby is still crying, and my sweet Danny cannot let that continue. He picks up the poor little girl and looks so adorable holding her! Oh, Danny!
Next, we go to visit Max, who is speaking German on the phone to someone who is going to sell him something. Not just any something, but something that Steve wanted Max to find for him to buy for Catherine. Hmmmm, what could it be, if it involves someone German? German chocolate cake? A 6-foot-tall beer stein? A cuckoo clock? Max is doing this personal shopper stuff because he and Steve are now BFFs.
I really need to be cast as one of these sad women who has lost a loved one. I would realistically throw myself into the arms of whichever handsome Five-0 is nearby and sob for hours. This woman, the sister of the diamond-and-almost-nothing-else-wearing woman who got shot, does not take advantage of her situation.
I like how Steve and Danny are dressed in opposite colors.
Cargument time! Danny again warns Steve about the dangers of Cath working for Billy.
Steve: “I’ve known you long enough to know that the only way to get you to shut-up is to let you speak. So, you know what? Go ahead, enlighten me, Dr. Phil.”
He is typical Danny here. A boy rabbit and a girl rabbit? What if you had jackals and hyenas instead?
Steve: “This pause right now, does that mean you’re done, or are you just taking a breath in between stupid assumptions?”
Danny: “I’m not going to say anything else.”
Steve knows he will hear about this again.
Several people commented last week that Danny sounded like he was speaking from personal experience, like perhaps that’s how he lost Rachel. Maybe she worked for Stan, with some long nights, bad Chinese food, and a “moment” or two. This week he sounds even more like he’s recounting his own history and superimposing it on Steve.
Chin Ho finds a recent article from some magazine about the Van Horns, with many pretty pictures of their house. He used his Detective Lieutenant skills to determine that the only item not in their house now that was in these pictures is a scrimshaw leaf. This particular leaf has the emblem of an ancient secret Hawaiian society, the Royal League, on it. Egads! We must go talk to Jerry, an expert on conspiracies and secrets.
Chin: “Handshakes are fine. Just let him initiate contact. And unless you guys have written some dissertations I don’t know about, do not mention JFK, Area 51, and definitely, no matter what, do not mention the Apollo moon landing.”
Danny: “Can we feed him after midnight?”
I just checked my front door. This is not the view. This is the view that greets Jerry’s mother at her (and Jerry’s) house.
I must apologize, because I have never watched either Lost or the X-Files, so I’m sure many inside jokes and references went way over my head and will not be mentioned here. I did get the “deserted island” joke and the “Scully” joke, though. I have no idea where this film is from, though. Is it something that most normal people would recognize?
Chin looked so adorable with Jerry’s mom’s lipstick on his face!
I’m fascinated by Jerry’s basement home. He has so much stuff!
Jerry and Chin are friends from high school band. They went to band camp together!
Jerry knows all about the Royal League. He believes they stole the Medici Rings, valuable artifacts from Italy, and smuggled them to Oahu. They haven’t been seen in 150 years. I’m impressed by how quickly Jerry finds a picture of them in his files.
I did extensive research to find out about the Medici Rings (I spent 30 seconds looking on Wikipedia). I didn’t find anything, but I did come up with this cool coat-of-arms for the House of Medici. It looks like a turkey who got a bad perm. I wonder what that means?
Duke calls with some information, and Steve and Danny are off to investigate. Jerry’s going to stay and research the rings.
Danny: “Say hi to the Hobbits for me.”
They find a workshop with plaster and modeling clay, and they find some bones inside a large box. Later in the episode I realized that this was a large kiln and the bones looked strange because they had been baked in this kiln. I guess I was too busy looking at Danny’s butt in those gray pants, so I didn’t pay attention to the story.
Cut to Catherine packing up everything from her locker at the Navy base. She’s pretty sad as well as nervous, which is very understandable. But then she gets what every woman desires: a surprise party waiting for her as she leaves the restroom! Yay! Cake in the hallway with Billy!
When Steve and Danny return to the Palace, they find Jerry out front taking pictures of the King Kamehameha statue. Except he isn’t “Jerry,” he’s just “a tourist.” We don’t want the people watching to know what’s going on. Steve understands this kind of secrecy, since he was a SEAL and did all the secret stealthy SEAL stuff that’s classified.
Jerry has some good information for them. He found out that some letters from the Mr. Van Horn who was part of the Royal League were recently stolen in Italy, and there’s a connection to the artist who made this statue! He has copies of the letters, and he suspects the rings were smuggled to Oahu inside the statue. But wait, there’s a problem. This particular statue was the second one of King Kamehameha. The original is on the island of Hawaii. Road trip time!
Nice picture of hot lava from a volcano spilling into the ocean. This would be incredible to see for real, I think!
While they’re on Kamekona’s helicopter on the way to the island, Steve gets a call from Cath. He had called her because he needs one last favor before she leaves the Navy. Someone needs to analyze those letters for a hidden message. Do you think she was annoyed that he didn’t comment about the cake?
Oops, the statue on Hawaii isn’t the real one. It’s made of plaster, and the real one is brass. I don’t know why they had to pick up that hand and look at it to figure out it’s plaster. The fact that Steve put a hammer through it didn’t convince anyone?
Back at HQ, Max comes to visit, wearing his awesomest red belt and some faboo red, white, and blue shoes.
He brings his BFF Steve the gift for Catherine. It cost only $1326.41. What?! Steve has $78.
Max doesn’t want to release the package to Steve until he pays up. Oh, dear. Steve just doesn’t have good luck with eBay, does he? Not for car parts or for mysterious packages.
Catherine has discovered that there was, indeed, a secret coded message in those letters. Jerry is afraid to open his eyes when they go to see her because he thinks they won’t let him leave if he sees anything confidential.
Jerry thinks Cath is attractive, but Danny warns him that “her boyfriend is an animal.” I know a few people who would pay $1326.41 to find out if he’s an animal!
Cath shows them the complicated code while she and Jerry discuss cyphers and stuff that I’ve never heard of. It turns out to be an elegant little passage that basically says the valuable stuff is hidden under Kamehameha’s foot.
At the bad guys’ hideout, they find the statue but no one has opened it yet! Hmmm, they don’t have the key. I guess they didn’t find it at the Van Horn home after all. Which leads me to a question I’ve had all along: Why didn’t they tie up the Van Horns and ask them about the leaf first, before shooting them?
The key is hidden inside a Hello Kitty backpack! No one would think to look there! Wait—no—it’s on display at the museum as part of a scrimshaw exhibit.
Steve and Danny find the bad guys at the museum and chase them. Danny takes one down while Steve tries to jump on the other. In all fairness, Steve’s guy had a motorcycle, which does make him harder to catch.
Danny: “You have been in a terrible motorcycle accident. It’s unadvisable that you stand up.”
Danny: “Let me guess. Book ‘em, Danno.”
Steve: “Would you mind?”
Now for the moment of truth. We have the correct statue and the leaf key. Jerry gets to do the honors and open Kamehameha’s foot.
He found the Medici Rings! Woot!
I loved how he hugged the guys. Especially how he wouldn’t let go of Danny.
This next scene was so lovely. Danny goes to the new home of the Van Horn’s little girl, who now lives with her aunt. He brings her a monkey that used to belong to his Monkey, but she’s outgrown it. “A monkey for a monkey.” I am melting with all the feelings.
The final scene is Catherine’s ceremony. Steve gives her the mysterious, expensive gift. It’s a Chicago album like the one her mother used to play for her when she was a scared little girl! That is…that is….I just don’t have words. Why can’t there really be men like that out there? Not only is he hot and handsome and brave, he’s incredibly thoughtful, too!
I loved the Ohana feel of the whole thing. So heartwarming to me.
Billy came, too. Steve’s not quite sure about him. Smart Steve. I don’t think you should trust Billy.